I was on the line with my Chinese partner when one of my Marketing Executives, Josephine, rushed in. She looked hot and flustered. She waited for me to finish my call before telling me in an urgent tone.
"Boss! Boss! Gerard needs ER! He's in the Men's Room!"
"Huh? What ER? What happened? He fell?"
"Quick! You go and see lah!"
I rushed towards the Men's Room where several of
the female staff, who have not gone for lunch yet, were gathered outside. They were giggling and shouting out to the men inside the washroom. I barged into the Men's Room, leaving the gals gasping loudly at my action.
I saw Man and Arshad standing outside a cubicle. I went forward and saw Joe kneeling down in front of Gerard who had his pants half-way down. Gerard got a shock when he saw me and yelled,"Close the door!!!"
"What the Hell is happening? What are you doing, Joe? " I raised my voice. I was disgusted by the scene right in front of me and put out my right hand to stop the door from closing.
"Gerard's got his dick caught in the zipper! hahahaha...." Arshad offered an explanation.
"What? Let me take a look!" I tried to push the door open.
"No! No! No! Joe's helping me."
"I cannot do anything lah! You have to go to the hospital." Joe stood up and declared defeat.
"What? How can I go out like this? It's lunch time, the whole Suntec City is packed! Owww .... sh*t! Can you all get Boss out? Call her for what! "
"Let me see!" I dragged Joe out of the cubicle and charged in.
Despite Gerard's protest, I knelt down, brushed his hands away and tried to survey the extent of the damage. I could hear the other guys sniggering away. The poor fellow has got a teeny piece of foreskin caught in his zipper. The zipper could neither go up nor down then. Ouch! I could almost feel his pain. hmmmm.... it's a tricky task as to how I'm going to get his dick freed.
"Get me a pair of scissors! And my glasses. I can't see so near."
"Weiii! Don't anyhow cut arh! I still want to celebrate Father's Day! Wait! Wait!Wait!"
"You want to walk through the lunch time crowd in this condition or not? This type of small case no need to go to the hospital lah! Who ask you not to wear underwear huh? Want to be hip and never think of the consequences."
I couldn't help chiding these youngsters. Either they don't wear underwear, or they would wear a teeny weeny piece of cloth over their private parts, ...... young men and women nowadays, tsk tsk tsk.......
Whenever I tried to gently pry the zipper from the skin, Gerard would be howling in pain. I was sweating in the hot cubicle. There was a commotion outside now as more people came to know of it. We had to lock the door of the toilet.
I examined the
I called Chris, twittered and pinged. Hoping someone can come up with a solution. Finally after an hour of trying and serious brainstorming, we have to make this announcement to Gerard.
"Joe and Man are going to hold you down. Remember how our Moms used to tear the plaster from your healed wounds? I'm gonna do a very fast zip down. It'll be over in seconds. Bear the pain for a while. Be a man, ok?"
"Don't anyhow move or I'll tear a whole strip of skin from your pecker! Arshad, get me the rubber bone from my table, let him bite on it. er.... Gerard, you pee already or not yet? Don't pee on me hor."
By then, another few guys returned to the office because of an 'emergency sms'. The kaypohs (busybodies)! Henry (remember my Creative Director) was doubling up in laughter. He offered to be the Executor. Everyone was poking fun at poor Gerard.
The moment finally arrived. I had to be the ruthless Executor (Gerard trusts me more). We made Gerard lie down on his back across two chairs, 4 guys held down his hands and legs. Henry covered Gerard's face with a jacket.
Secretly and silently, trying very hard to contain our laughter, we posed for a few pictures first, hahahaha.... We were so wicked hor! Then we told Gerard to take a deep breath and then zippp! It was over!
Sounds so easy. Gerard almost jumped out of his skin and the guys have to really hold him down. A tiny piece of skin and a little speck of blood was sacrificed. Gerard took it like a man! There was a drop of tear at the edge of his right eye though. awwww...... hehehe....
After washing my hands, I told Gerard,"From now on, your dick is mine! I saved it." muahahahaha.....
A warning to all my staff, if any of my photos go public, your dicks and pussies would be mine. No hehehe.
And to those 'pig frenz and dog buddies' who thought I was having an affair - go fug yourself! Geez.........
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Winner at Blog Carnivals on 4th August 2007