Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Should my son marry at age 16?

My cousin from Malaysia came to visit during our National Day holidays. She came with her two elder daughters and 3 grandchildren. They stayed with my family while they were here.

My cousin is only one year my senior and she is already a grandmother to 3 young children!!! She became a grandmother at age 36! Gosh. It does make me envy her.

My cousin Hua hails from a small town in Johor, Malaysia. She worked for a year as a domestic helper in Singapore before going back to get married, at age 16! She had her eldest daughter the following year. She has 2 girls and a boy.

Her eldest daughter married at age 19 and had a son and a daughter within 3 years of her marriage. Hua's second daughter married at age 20 and is a mother to a toddler son. Hua's son is getting married end of this year!

Hua's mother, who is my mother's younger sister, married young too. She is only 62 and she is already a great grandmother! She is likely to see her great-great grandchildren in her lifetime! My mother is 70 and her eldest grandson is only 15!

After my relatives left,I actually discussed with my son, Jaymes about him getting married next year. hahaha...... I showed him a list of the benefits of getting married young. I offered him incentives and help with his kids. He's so smart, he doesn't want to be tied down so young. duh.

For now, I can only day-dream. About me being a grandmother. Could you imagine me being a grandma in 2 years' time? kekeke.......


  1. Then you'll be the Hawtest Gucci Grandmomma!!! :D

  2. eastcoastlife,
    You're trying to con your son on getting married early eh? hahaha! I'm curious what's the benefits on getting married young. Maybe you can write another post on it. haha!

  3. Too young lehhhhhh....got grand kids in 2 yrs time..U wont be able to go anywhere liao...tat is if u jadik babysitter la..No no.enjoy a few more yrs of freedom sin..I am sure my MIL will second that..hehe

  4. My angel,
    Yeah!! I'll be promoted to Hottest Grandma! kekeke.....

  5. Kok,
    Yup, hehehe.... a con job.

    I'll post the benefits up tomorrow. Hope to get more people to get married earlier. :)

  6. Grandma ECL! Hehe! :D

    For a guy maybe 16 is too young lah. Need to do NS and all that. Maybe after NS can.

  7. Eve,
    Not necessarily for me to babysit them personally gua. I can employ a nanny and maid.

    Of course I would help to look after my grandkids, but I should also have my own life. My son and his wife still have to do their duties and responsibilities as parents.

    Your poor MIL.... hehe...

  8. moby,
    He can also get married first, then go NS! Maybe he would be the youngest father in his platoon! hehe....

  9. Nice daydream but dicey!
    Marriage is a little heavy for his young shoulders ... he has miles to walk and a career to forge yet ... have mercy lah!

  10. wah...like that ah?

    how old would his wife be????

    actually, no need to marry, still can be granma, mah.. guffaw guffaw guffaw...

    *runs away fast fast*

  11. Jas,
    Oh my. I'm taking my day-dreaming too far. :P

    When people become better educated, they have more things to consider. There is a certain time for doing certain things. We still do have teenagers marrying young in our world somewhere.

    It's a little too early for my son to get married, but if he is ready, I would support his decision. He has my business to take over, so I'm not worried about his future.

  12. mott,
    His wife would probably be 15 or 16 gua!

    hmmmm..... I did hint to him that I can be grandma without being a mother-in-law. hehehe.... I can raise the grandkids and go without a DIL. :P

  13. noooo!! siaw ar marry young. :P

    kekekekeke. must go arnd the world, experiment new things, siaw siaw first then can settle down and marry. :D

  14. the life in MY, especially in small town is very diff from SG.

    all my cousins already have few kids, while I don't want any.

  15. ehon,
    Have kids already also can go round the world. I take care of his kids while he go tour lah!

    shhhhh...... shoo shoo.
    I'm still working on my son, don't gao gao zan and sabo me.

  16. hanneng,
    Yes, I understand the life in small towns in MY is different. But we can also change our lifestyle in big cities.

    Why don't want kids? At least have one. You will regret when you're older. I wish I had more kids. :(

  17. agree that educated ppl will consider more....

    my m'sian relatives also married in younger age... but me...ha...freedom!?

  18. err... ECL, today got take your medicine or not. Nowadays where got ppl married so young. 21y/o ok la. Less than 20y/o, fullamak! Really too young leh.

  19. ah hong,
    freedom!? Too much freedom also not happy wor.

    Must get someone to control us a bit. Next have kids, control them. Then they grow up, they control you. Fun ah? hehehe....

  20. HijackQueen,
    Oops.... a few days I haven't take my medicine already. hahaha.....

    I'm just planting the seed of marriage in his young mind. Hope it would start germinating and then he would be prepared for marriage. And that he shouldn't have any worry that there won't be help and support from his parents.

    If he wants to get married earlier, I have no objection!!! :)

  21. It would be good to be a young grandmother. How I wish too... But its gonna be a long wait for me, my kiddo still so young... alamak !! :)

  22. Janice,
    You're way too far to be a grandma! Another 20 years, mebbe! Remain the Hot Mama lah! :)

  23. Too young to get marry la. I guess he would like to have all the fun before being tie up by a wife. Hehe

  24. windy,
    yup. agree. So the next few months I'll let him have all the fun he want. hehehe.....

  25. Doesn't matter when as long as love has found him. Do I sound like a hopeless romantic?

  26. giddy tiger,
    Yup, you sure are a hopeless romantic! You know French sum more! Wah!

    Sometimes waiting for love and the right person to come along is not practical and can wait until die!!!

  27. that is a lovely son!
    my mom is 70 too lol
    i think JP man can marry after 18 years old.
    yeah 16 is too young to be responsible :)

  28. I am 36 and my son is 3.. I have a while yet before I become a grandma! :)

  29. wow, u'd be a cool hip vampire vanquishing granny :P but till that day come true, can you pretty please do a tag? :P


  30. Nolah....pls..16? haha unless *accident* la...But NO LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

  31. Niki-chan,

    Oops. Your Mom is 70 and you are still not married. She must be looking forward to your marriage and grandchildren. :P

    I think my son is matured enough to get married at 16.

  32. Marry early....enjoy life early as they say...
    but then, divorce also early....most of the time....

    best wishes

    and Happy National Day.
    We have, at least for once, Merdeka!


  33. Hi gerri,
    Yup, looks like you have at least a decade before becoming a grandma! :)

  34. sweetpea,
    wei.... fuiyohhhh.... after praising me, slam me with a tag ah!

  35. sasha,
    aiyooo.... why so many of you object huh? Cannot see my views. ish.

  36. Hello azrin,
    Wah! You go holiday ah! Now in Paris?

    If my son gets a divorce, I dun care lah. Important is I have grandchildren. DIL not important. hahaha.....

  37. You will be an awesome granny, but I'm glad your son is going to wait.

  38. Bunny Beth,
    Yup, I think so too. :)

    I hope my son's not gonna take a long time to get married. I can't wait. hehe....

  39. me too, I wanna be a grandmother too but I just told my eldest son not to fool around!

  40. ecl, aiyoh, I think if your son really wants to marry at 16, you will hit the roof! :)

    Why you want to be a young grandmother ah? Then be like me lor, change the name of your blog, no need to be a real grandmother one! Wahahaha....

  41. Pinkie,
    aiyooo... of course not to fool around. But I'm trying to get my son to settle down earlier. hehehe....

  42. Judy,
    Sooner or later, I'm going to be a grandmother, like it or not. So it's better I become a grandma earlier so I have more energy to play and look after my grandkids.

    And I can hand over my business to Jaymes, and shake legs at home. :)

    I dun want to be grandma in blog! I want grandkids!

  43. OMG ... you know what?! If nobody tells me anything about you ... I would have thought that picture was a brother and sister shot. I am serious. No kidding. Cross my heart.

    On a side note, I think marry young is good. I have seen my friends whose parents had them very young and by forties, their kids are all independent and they are being supported for such an early retirement. It is blessing you know.

    Ya ... stop giving condoms to your son. Raging hormone will give you lots of grand children. Trust me trust me.

  44. Wilfrid,
    Yeah!!! A supporter finally!

    Ahhhh... see, I'm youthful looking eh! Many people said I look like my son's elder sister :)

    Precisely. Marry early, have children early and can retire early! My hubby married me at age 32, and he has to work for another 10 years to see my son through University! Too old, how to go round the world with his pretty wife? hehe....

    I must take back the condoms I gave to my son. :)

  45. eastcoastlife,
    I'm looking forward for your posts on Benefits of Getting Married Early. hahaha! Maybe I'll object kao kao. Be prepared!:P

  46. Kok,
    Well, I would like to hear different views on this subject from different people and age groups.

    My son provided his own reasons too. I accepted some and rejected some. :)

    Wait for my post oh. ^-^

  47. At 16 he's just a child like we say here in Europe. Don't rush him, he should be more mature before getting married. My opinion of course...

  48. Hi Laura,
    Thanks for stopping by.

    Yes, he's too young to get married at 16. :( My son is rather matured for his age though. Guess I would have to wait it out.

  49. Getting married at sixteen! Gosh, cannot imagine :O

  50. Nowadays boys are smart! So... disappointed? Cannot be grandmother so early? I think you'll just fainted , if you know ur son is getting married in his teenage age...


  51. Hello? Cant even drink in public, how to marry? Too young la! I am sure you dont want to be called grandma yet, or be known as the mother-in law! Hahaha.

  52. A very smart young man indeed..!! but you will still be a sexy grammie.. when the time comes.. i'm pretty sure.. ;)

  53. Run Jaymes run!!!!


    You would be one hot Granny if he got on with it.

  54. Well lets see... I was a grandma at 36 thanks to my son. One of my daughters got married at 18 but they waited for 5 years to have kids. Now they have 6. Another was 24, and the other was 19, that one is now on baby 3. So now at 50 I have 13 grandkids ranging from 15 to 4 months, with one on the way. And we expect to have another on the way some time soon.

  55. tigerfish,
    Cannot imagine teenagers marrying at 16? Shall I let Jaymes show you? hahaha.....

  56. Healy,
    I won't faint. I'll be happy. My hubby too. hehe...

    Additions to the family. The more the merrier. :)

  57. stay-at-home mum,
    I have no problem with being addressed as Grandma by my grandkids or mother-in-law. I would like that. hehe.....

  58. Mamabok,
    I hope so. At least another 10 years if Jaymes decide to wait. hmmm......

  59. simple american,
    haha.... yup. I'll be a Hot Granny if he has children!

  60. oldqueen44,
    Oh yes!!! 13 grandkids at age 50! And your oldest grandkid is 15! Wow! I would love that!

    Have to talk to my son again! :P

  61. Hmm... this ECL... 'han pou xun'

    It would be a real pity, if he marry so young

  62. hehehe....yenjai,
    Don't you han pou xun too!?

    I love kids. Rather than I have them, I prefer my son to take over that responsibility. And he has help from his parents. :)

  63. Among other things, you'll get this from strangers,

    "You? A grandma? Nooooo way! Get outta here, you big joker you!"

    Getting your son to marry asap seems so much more attractive suddenly, eh? :p

  64. Hi Cairo's Mommy,
    Oh yes, hahaha.... it does make me look good eh!?

    This hip grandma bringing the grandkids to and from school. Waaahhh.... must nag my son some more tonight!!!!

  65. Ah Maa, lim teh.
    Ah Maa, jiak peng.

    Oops.. that's for Ah Maa of yesteryear. Now:

    Ah Ma, let's go shopping.
    Ah Ma, i want a PS3 for my birthday.

  66. Bernard,
    No! It's this :

    Amah, let's hip-hop.

    Amah, let's challenge PS3.

    Amak, let's go bar-top dancing!

    Amah, let's go chiong!!!! Check out the new ducks in town! hahahahaha........

  67. getting married at 16 years old?
    this is not in the 60's leh

  68. chen,
    16 cannot get married meh? Can! I give permission already mah.

    My son is matured and well developed liao. Can lah!

    It's not happening only in the 60s. It is also happening everyday, everywhere!

  69. If your son get married and have kids, you will be one of the hippy MIL & grandma :)

    It will be 20 yrs later before I can wish like you. Kekeke...

  70. U mean you wanna be a grandma at such a young age? I get heart attacks even when people call me aunty :P

  71. lzmommy,
    Yup, I should start setting up a club for hippy MIL and grandmas now!

    20 years! You have a long way to go, baby. hehe.....

  72. Hello miche,
    Long time no see.

    My son resembles me ah. :)

  73. immomsdaughter,
    haha.... I used to get heart attacks too when others call me Aunty. But more and more people are calling me Aunty, so I got used to it.

    Now I have to condition myself to being called Amah. hahaha......